21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”
22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
Matthew 18: 21-22
I have this friend that I am really close to and they did something to me that I thought was unforgivable or close to that extent. This is one person who knows everything about me and they are supposed to be the last person on earth to ever do something like this. As I get older and meet more people I realize that trust is absolutely vital to relationships. If there’s no trust then what is there? it’s all meaningless!
I wasn’t as hurt over what they did as I was over how much they deceived me and the extent they went to reassure me that what I thought was happening wasn’t happening. All I could think about were the times I asked and they looked me in my eyes and blatantly lied. What they did was absolutely wrong and the fact that they have not apologized does not help anything. When their response was not remorseful I blocked them off everything. Their number was blocked, Instagram, snap chat, WhatsApp you name it. I was very angry and I think I was rightly so. However, this anger I was holding on to was not benefiting me at all. That’s the thing about anger, it makes you feel justified and condemns the other person but staying angry solves nothing.
Today God humbled me. There was a time that I did something that hurt this particular person and they let it go and we worked through that. I was extremely ashamed of what I did and was thankful and humbled when they did not hold it against me. When I thought of that time, my brain argued that what they did was worse but my heart reasoned that the hurt caused was the same. I thought about the person as a whole. I considered them from all this time that we had known each other. Even now as we are not speaking, I know they have my back. If I was in any kind of trouble and I called them up, I know they would be here. I am like that to them as well. So all in all, this is not a person to give up on. God put in on my heart to extend the forgiveness he so eagerly offers to me when I ask for it to them. I did it and I feel light and free.
Trust will have to be rebuilt. That’s the thing about life and relationships though. People are not perfect and we will hurt each other. My goal in every relationship is to be quick to forgive, to act in love and to be kind. Always, as my God is.